Wedding Mistakes

August 10, 2009

I’m always in favor of a little self-help, so we’ll start this Monday off with an article from The Knot meant to help brides-to-be avoid the most frequent wedding planning slip ups. In Wedding Planning: 10 Most Common Wedding Planning Mistakes, Kate Wood details various snafus that brides are likely to commit while planning their big day, and the clever ways to avoid them.

One of the most helpful pieces of advice is to make sure you have the guest list pretty much set before you make any other big decisions. From my own experience, after someone gets engaged, she excitedly thinks “venue, cake, flowers — oh my!” and starts planning like a wild woman, all before knowing who exactly will be in attendance. The number of people coming can have a huge impact on what sort of wedding you will want to have. Just make sure you know whether or not dear old Aunt Sally is coming before you book that off-the-wall reception spot in Vegas…she might not be able to take the shock of it all.

Another popular mistake involves the bride-to-be bombarding her fiance with soliloquies about all the fabulous trends found in the latest issue of Bride Magazine. To be clear, the responsibility of planning a wedding should not fall entirely on a bride’s shoulders. The groom should absolutely take a vested interest in the details of the wedding. That being said, pelting the poor guy with questions about “peonies or dahlias?” will inevitably send him running for the hills, wondering what on earth happened to the (relatively) sane girl he proposed to? To avoid this, perhaps you can split up the to-do list into specific tasks that each of you will enjoy planning. For instance, ask your fiance to be in charge of selecting tuxes, picking out a DJ/band and researching different honeymoon options. He may not give a hoot about the maid of honor’s shoe color, but he probably won’t protest to planning your trip to Fiji.

Lastly comes one of the top wedding mistakes made by frazzled brides-to-be…selecting a dress two sizes too small as motivation to lose 20 pounds before your wedding. While it’s admirable to try and get into shape, it is vital that you keep your expectations reasonable. Five pounds is totally achievable, ten pounds is plausible…anything more than that? Not very likely, especially given the stress you’ll be under thanks to all the other details that will need attending to. Keep some perspective by remembering that your fiance proposed to YOU…not a 50 pound lighter version of you. Besides, we’ve all seen the “Bridezillas” episodes where the bride does not achieve her weight loss goal and the dress does not fit…ooo boy. That’s scary stuff right there.

When it comes down to it, it’s fine to set some goals for yourself. However, it’s important that you ask yourself, “Will I still be perfectly happy on my wedding day even if (insert insignificant concern here, such as ‘I don’t lose any weight’)?” That answer should, obviously, be yes. If it’s not, you have far more to worry about than squeezing into a too-small wedding dress. And that’s no good, because therapy bills probably shouldn’t have to be factored in to the wedding planning process.

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